Saturday, March 20, 2010

Wordplay

You know, I was looking through the dictionary hours back to get in touch with words that seem so ancient to me now compared to back then. Army makes a person stupid. It's evident. I can't help it. Anyhow, have you ever wondered who invented the dictionary? And how he had to memorize so much words to write down and explain the meaning for? That's a tough piece of shit I kid you not. But of course, as much as he did his best, he conveniently left out a few words. And he left out words so obvious that sometimes when I see people doing something, I wouldn't know how to explain it to my friends what they were doing. Coz there are no words in english to explain what they are doing. So, let's make things simple. Let's unword them. Like this:


Alcological [Al-co-low-gi-cal]a. (adj) Things that seem logical only after consuming large amounts of alcohol.


Disconfect [Dis-kon-fect]a. (v.) To sterilize a piece of candy that dropped on the floor by blowing it. This is perfectly useful for my mum.


Baldage [Bal-dayge]a. (n.) The accumulation of hair in the drain after showering. Especially for my mum.


Abandick [Ab-an-dig]a. (v.tr.) To leave a man in the middle of sex just because you think you're going too far cause you're Singapore's most innocent girl and a family throne, causing him to be left behind in frustration and physical discomfort.


Benefriend [Ben-e-ffrr-end]a. (n.) A so-called friend with whom one partakes in devious activities, often stereotyped as sexually immoral acts, without fear of ruining the friendship and without any commitment. A friend with benefits if you ask me. [Please do ask me actually!]


Elecelleration [El-a-cel-ayshun]n. The mistaken notion that the more faster and harder you press the buttons in the lift, the faster it'll arrive.


Frust [Fr-ust]n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept into the dustpan and keeps backing a person across the rooms until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.


Neonphancy [Ne-on-pan-cy]n. A floresant light bulb struggling to come to life.


Phonesia [Fo-ne-zia] The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting who we are calling just as they answer.


Kidiot [Key-di-ot]a. (n.) A highly annoying kid.


Nipply [Nip-li]a. (adv.) Condition caused by a cold room, excitement or fear.


Camouflush [Cam-oh-flush]a. (n.) The unnecessary flushing of a public restroom toilet to mask embarrassing bodily sounds.


Decompliment [De-kom-ple-ment]a. (v.) To immediately insult someone after complimenting them, thereby rendering the compliment void.


Brunch [Brun-ch]a. (n.) A meal taken on behalf of the missed breakfast and lunch.


Fagnostic [Fag-nos-tik]a. (n.) Someone who refuses to admit they are gay or lesbian even though everyone else around them knows that they are.


Chillaxing [Chill-axe-ink] a. (v.tr.) Actively chilling and relaxing; Taking things easy; Staying cool.


Hiccaburp [Hik-ka-burp] a. (v.) To uncontrollably and simultaneously hiccup and burp.


Unfhair [Un-fare]a. (adj.) Marked by the ability to grow hair on one's ears, nose, the back of one's neck, on one's back or on one's rear, but not on the top of one's own head.


Zipcuff [Zeep-kaf]a. (v.) To be trapped in one's trousers by a faulty zipper.

Praba - 1:00 AM 136 comment(s)



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Property Of Rough Rhymes


Praba.
20 This Year.
Cursed to be here.
First to be clear.

You won't understand till we trade places.
I need my own breathing spaces.

See, my life ain't promised.
But it'll sure get better.
Hope you undastan my love letter.

I dropped 5 times but I'm still breathin'.
Livin' proof there's a god if you need a reason.

I think about it everyday.
I haf so much to say.
My main thing was to be major paid.
This game's sharper than a muthafuckin' razor blade.

I wanna be meaningful.
Not winnin' fools.
I followed fools.
Swallowed rules.
Now I'm starting to trip.
I'm losing my grip.

Many were impressed when they saw praba writin'.
Now wait for him to start fightin'
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