Rough Rhymes

Monday, May 19, 2008

Just to let you know, I've got my sim card replaced and I'm back to the old number of 91094353. The hi card number that I've sent you will act as a replacement in the event of any mishap to the current line. I don't know what mobile subscriber you subscribe to but I subscribe to Starhub. Mistake made. Lesson learned. They say starhub covers 99.9% of places in singapore now. Looks like Tekka happens to be the 0.1%. I get reception everywhere else, including undergrounds, BUT home. Why the fuck does Starhub fuck it up all the time? I remember blogging about Starhub a week ago and this time, I got so pissed that I sent them an email. Which goes like this:

"Dear Sir/Madam,

I would like to commend Starhub on their fascinating features of my Nokia 1100. In all these years as a mobile phone user, no other phone has given me the opportunity to take so much time from my busy schedule in order to pay your service center a visit. So much so that I've been more than acquainted with your staff and can even recognize them by face!

It's just recently that I realized my Nokia 1100 has been installed with high technology, way ahead of it's time, intelligence system. Firstly, the 'power saving, auto-off system' that Nokia has incorporated into my phone. Since the introduction of your power saving auto-off system, I have been able to count with my fingers the amount of times I actually charged the phone. My phone is barely switched on for 30 minutes and this has helped me save a lot of time, electricity and money charging my handphone. It's been some time since I looked at my handphone screen and this has helped me look at more faces in the bus rather than the dull blue screen. I totally understand now when you say "Connecting People."

Secondly, I like the 'auto-delete, why bother?' function that Nokia has added to the phone. That way, I no longer need to search for numbers and will make an attempt to memorize the numbers instead. I wouldn't even need to worry about numbers I barely dial.

Thirdly, the 'now you see it, now you don't' function incorporated into my microchips, totally kicks ass. It has provided me all the more excuses I need to not return a call or message by not showing me my recent call lists and messages. It has even restricted my incoming/outgoing calls. That way, I save on my handphone bill cause if I don't send out any outgoing information, then I am not liable for any charges. No wonder my bill stays the standard subscription amount and my messages have been on the roll over to accumulate a whooping grand total of 8,000 free messages.

Today marked the occasion of my 3rd visit to your service center in the 2nd week that I've owned the phone. That will be shortly followed by a 4th when I collect the phone. I am really looking forward to sitting in your waiting area again watching the "Mr Bean" comedies that you play on TV for our viewing pleasure. Thank you for taking time in reading my email which I am sure will be checked and placed in the 'spam' folder shortly. I will of course blog and tell all my friends about the new wonderful features of the Nokia 1100. I am still wondering if Sony Ericsson phones have such high technological advances. I guess the only way, is to find out for myself. And that's exactly what I will do. AS A M1 SUBSCRIBER.

Yours faithfully,
Praba"

Labels: Handphone, Starhub

Praba - 3:03 AM 6 comment(s)

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Name - Praba
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Birthday - 19 May
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E-Mail - narakabarp@gmail.com

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Anonymous @ Hahahhaha.. Praba!!! That email was awesome la... It realli kicks ass... I had a wonderful tyme reading it aloud to ma bro, who was laughing his lungs out... No More STARHUB yea!!! Hehehhe~ 8:14 PM
Praba @ Fuck starhub, I now gonna peng to Singtel or M1 liao. 5:46 PM
Anonymous @ i thought phones and lines are different? 1:29 AM
Anonymous @ You should send that email to Nokia not Starhub. 12:48 PM
Anonymous @ I agree that Starhub screws up pretty BAD.. The last time I renewed my contract, I so eagerly brought home my Nokia N82 & powered it on for the 1st time aft charging it.. Only to find out that the LCD display screen was cracked & the Warranty doesnt cover physical damage nor replacement of handset.
Starhub sucks but the best part is that their stupid too.. Just gotta play ur game right.. Btw, if u think Starhub gives BAD service u shd try NOKIA. I lost my patience and shouted at the CSO at the front counter.
Your Email to them was Awesome.. 4:41 PM
Praba @ Dear anonymous, firstly, tag with your fucking name can? I dun entertain nameless souls. I remember blogging about nameless souls. Read when you have the time. But just to clarify your dying curiosity, I mailed Starhub coz they were the ones who issued me the Nokia phone. If all nokia models were like the ones I got, then i would have mailed nokia. But since it's only my particular phone, I decided to screw starhub.

Dear priya, I love the part you mentioned about shouting at the CSO. But relax la. Why you so hardcore? Yea I know their services suck. Maybe it's about time I visit starhub and nokia centers. They had a heart attack the last time I went down. 11:30 PM

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