Rough Rhymes

Thursday, May 08, 2008

This, is how you pose a question, Praba's style:

Friend: Hey praba, I messaged *** **** for a blazer and all he says is ok but never returns.
Me: What did you tell him?
Friend: *Copies and pastes* Hey, can you return my jacket? You were supposed to return it to me last week. Where is it?
Me: That's not the way educated adults solve the matter.
Friend: *Blur* Why?
Me: Sometimes, you gotta intensify the matter to make it work. Add in a few magical words to make it happen. That is to say, throw in a few 'fucks' to make the matter look more serious than it already is. Works best when you want something back.
Friend: *Laughs* Magical words? How?
Me: Ah. That's a good question. I'll modify your sentence without changing the words and meaning. See if it sounds more intensi-fucking-fied.
Friend: *Laughs* Okay.
Me: Ok, this is how you pose the question: "Hey fucker, can you fucking return my fucking jacket? You were fucking supposed to return it to me last fucking week. Where the fuck is it?"
Friend: *Laughs* Ok, and what if he still doesn't return.
Me: Add a new magical word and say it "I'll motherfucking bash the motherfucking soul outta you motherfucking asshole!"
Friend: Woah! You sure spew a lot of vulgarities.
Me: As long as it gets the job done.
Friend: That's FUCKING true.
Me: THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!

Labels: Advices