Rough Rhymes

Monday, March 05, 2007

Ways to identify a women:

1. When asked "Is something wrong?", reply 'no' then get pissed off when you are believed.

2. Become attracted to someone because he is outgoing and loves parties. Start dating him and then immediately expect him to stop this behavior..

3. Always take an hour longer than promised to meet up.

4. Camouflage 'very important' events in very unimportant terms so you can have something to be pissed about when your boyfriend declines. [For example: You say "It's no big deal, but I was wondering if you would like to visit my parents with me if you're not busy this weekend." when you actually mean "It means a great deal to me for you to see my family with me this weekend whether or not it is possible!"]

5. WHINE.

6. If you are trying to sleep, it's because you're exhausted from your almost superhuman level of daily achievement. [When I sleep, it means I am lazy]

7. No matter what the activity, he doesn't do it as well as a past boyfriend.

8. If he pays attention to you, he is smothering you.

9. If he gives you space, he is ignoring you.

10. COMPLAIN.

11. Hate any bar he likes.

12. Demand to be treated as an equal in everything. [Except when paying for meals, movies, concerts, beers, clothes etc.]

13. Declare PMS at any given time. If he is knowledgeable about your cycle, tell him you're irregular from all the stress in your life.

14. Remember that ANY woman who so stares as much at your boyfriend must be labeled a SLUT and your network of friends must be informed immediately to spread this as quick as possible.

15. Make his life miserable by making him feel guilty about doing anything other than catering to your needs.

16. Break into tears for no apparent reason.

17. Ask for help in some endeavor then become livid when it is given.

18. Merge yourself into your boyfriend's group of friends. Break up with him then make sure you are present at every gathering for the next few months just to rub it in.

Labels: Women

Praba - 4:26 AM 0 comment(s)

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